One moment was during an evening event at the office, and the other was while I was on holiday in Costa Rica. As different as those circumstances were, the moments were connected, and they represented both a culmination and a beginning. I share them in the spirit of sharing good news with friends. And in the hope that the path I took to those two best moments might help you experience your own.
Overcoming the resistance
Wearing a bathing suit and sandals, I capped several years of work by shipping the final manuscript of Working Out Loud to be formatted, the final step before it’s available on Amazon in about a month.
It’s not so much finishing a book that made it a special moment. Millions of people write books each year. It’s overcoming what Steven Pressfield calls “the resistance” and what Seth Godin refers to as “the lizard brain.”
Every day till the moment I hit “submit,” the voices in my head were insistent:
It’s not ready.
It’s not good enough.
You’re not good enough.
I couldn’t turn the voices off. They are, I know, just trying to protect me from disappointment and rejection. I also know that the long-term consequences of not making the effort are much more harmful.
The things that helped me ship are framing the work as a contribution and the feedback from people who have read and applied the ideas in the book. Offering my work as a gift means I can be free of expectations - number of copies sold, good reviews - as my only goal is to help people. The feedback lets me know at least some people will appreciate my contribution. If others don’t like it, I'll take solace in knowing “you can be a delicious ripe peach and there will still be people in the world that hate peaches.”
Bringing my whole self to work
The other moment was earlier this month was when I spoke to a large group at my firm about Working Out Loud circles and half of them formed circles as a result.
Though I had written and spoken about my work before, this event wasn’t sponsored by me but rather by an official employee network in the firm. It was promoted via email and on screens in the elevators and in the lobby.
It was as if I finally connected all the time spent researching and writing and coaching with what I actually do for a living. After all, no one had ever asked me to write a book or give talks or try to form a movement that empowered people. I just did. Somehow, having that work recognized and promoted by the institution helped connect the different kinds of work I do and made me feel whole.
As a result, my presentation that evening was the best talk I ever gave. I think it was because I delivered my authentic self, and put all of me into the talk.
When will your best moments be?
When I ask people “When are the best years of your life?” some people are clear that their best moments happened long ago.
It makes me sad they’re so certain about their future and that it holds so little promise for them.
Whatever your age or job or experience, I want more people to know that the best moments of your life are just the best moments so far. By equipping people with some new skills and habits, and some simple switches in their mindset, I want to help them discover and gain access to more possibilities.
I want to help them experience more best moments.